Growing up, of course I came across clips and episodes of "The Big Bang Theory". It's been playing on free-to-air TV for as long as I can remember. And to be honest, I never really got into it. So I didn't expect to be hooked by "Young Sheldon". After all, if I didn't like adult Sheldon, why would I like him as a child?
But I still watched the first couple of episodes with my friend because she wanted to. And then I left it for a couple of years. Of course, during this time, I was bombarded with clips from the show because everyone and their mother was watching it. And so of course I had to join in. Especially after already starting it.
And while I knew it had to be well written, considering how popular it is, I didn't expect it to impact me the way that it did. Though I'd certainly never binge watched "The Big Bang Theory", I still knew enough to know what would happen by the end of "Young Sheldon". And after practically watching these kids grow up. After getting to know George. There were several moments during the last few seasons that I almost started crying, thinking about what was to come.
The Show Got Me To Empathise With Sheldon
Is Sheldon a know-it-all prick who deserves to be taken down a notch? Sure. Are there times he hurts someone by being completely careless? Yep. Does he spend an inordinate amount of time talking about himself and make every conversation about him? Yep.
But when it comes down to it, that man genuinely cares about his family. But he lacks emotional intelligence and struggles, both, to communicate and understand people. Sometimes he genuinely doesn't realise he's being hurtful. In the same breath, he doesn't realise when other people are being mean to him.
And this makes him seem like someone who is uncaring and cruel. But that's not at all the case. And: spoilers for the entirety of "Young Sheldon". When his father dies, he's genuinely distraught. He recedes into himself completely and spends days reimagining his father's last moments. He ruminates on the possibilities and what he could've done differently. But when asked what he's thinking about, instead of revealing that he's thinking about his father's last moments, he focuses on the science.
And Missy lashes out at him. He's made to feel like a strange creature and he doesn't even get to defend himself for it. And in the end, he's still the one who takes steps to appease his mother and sister. He doesn't try to get an apology out of Missy. He gets baptised because it's important to his mother. And this is only his final act of compassion in the show.
Even during earlier seasons, when Missy was lashing out, he went after her. And sure, he did need to be told that he's the big brother and so it's his job to protect her, but he took it to heart. And while they had their squabbles, when it really came down to it, he tried his best to look out for her. And some of the things he did, like tattling on her when she was sneaking out to smoke, was the right call.
Sheldon's problem isn't a lack of compassion. His problem is that he lacks empathy. And a huge part of it does come from the fact that the things people want and expect from him aren't things he wants or expects for himself. He genuinely doesn't understand the need. And while he could do a lot more to develop his understanding of other people, he also just doesn't care enough to try.
And it obviously doesn't help that Mary coddled him for most of his life. He was simultaneously babied and at the same time given responsibilities he shouldn't have to bear. He shouldn't be the one doing taxes for his family. It's not fair to expect a small child to take on the burdens of his family's financial struggles. And I don't think it helps how soon he went off to University.
Because despite his intelligence, he's still very young when he goes off to another state to live on his own. Some of his behaviour even makes sense considering his age. And I genuinely think he might've grown to be a more socially aware person if more effort had been made to develop his social skills. It's not fair to always yell at him without trying to also teach him. It honestly seemed like most people expected him to just figure it out on his own. And got increasingly mad when he didn't.
So yeah, I felt sorry for him. I felt sorry for the entire family.
Missy And Georgy
I don't think any of the Cooper kids were parented correctly. Missy was often ignored and viewed as an afterthought. Before she ever started acting out, she consistently expressed how she felt like the odd one out in her family. She could see that her father and Georgy were a team. And she could see her mother and Sheldon were a team. But no one really seemed to be on her side.
Sure, both of her parents tried to fix this throughout the show. But it was a matter of too little, too late. And I think her intelligence actually makes things worse for her. She's always had an incredible awareness of others' emotions. She could tell when something is wrong, even if she couldn't accurately decipher the cause. She was surrounded by conflict and while being the first to notice it, she was the last to be told about it.
And then you have Georgy. I'd argue he's also neglected at times. It's not healthy how little his parents knew about him. Before he'd ever gotten to the stage of dropping out, his parents should've caught on. They should've made more of an effort to keep track of him. It's not even just that he's a problem child, but it almost feels like his parents just gave up on him. They make no attempts to hide the fact that they think he's stupid.
And so he's either switching between being the problem child or he's having to step up and take on a parental role for his siblings. And honestly, I get it. George and Mary loved their kids but they weren't ready to look after them. But it meant that during a crisis, George had to step up. He couldn't simply be their kid. He had to be a parent to his siblings and then later a parent to his daughter.
Mary Cooper: The Problem With Overly Religious Mothers
I'm not going to lie, Mary definitely pissed me off at times. There were times her devotion to religion went too far. Times when she prioritised her faith, or rather her connection to church, over her own children. And she made quite a lot of questionable decisions. And because she always tried to forcefully maintain her image as a good Christian, she wasn't a safe space for her children to come to.
She was hyper critical and judgmental. And she didn't understand the impact of this until it was turned on her. And despite the fact that she herself didn't always start off religious, she expected blind faith and devotion from her children. Which meant she often tried to force her values on them.
Now, I do appreciate everything she did for her family. Mary Cooper genuinely loves her husband and children. And I don't think she realised how often she was alienating them from her. Or how often she tried to restrict their choices while making her own without taking their needs into consideration.
But her main issue is that she thought she always knew the best for everyone else. She bulldozed her way into conflicts without taking the time to get all the facts. And it meant the few times George stepped up and was trying to solve a conflict, she undermined him and undid his efforts. Which meant he resented her for not treating him like an equal parent and she resented him for not taking more of the emotional labour.
George's Death Hit Me Hard
George Cooper is an incredibly flawed man. He made mistakes both as a husband and father. And I don't like how comfortable he was letting Mary be the bad guy. Or the fact that he had to be coaxed into spending time with his own daughter.
But he does get better. He tries to do the right thing. And when push comes to shove, he will always protect his family. Let's not forget that when Veronica's stepfather grabbed Georgy and tried to forcefully take Veronica, George knocked him out cold. And when there was a tornado going through Medford, he used his own body to shield Missy.
And he does get better in the final season. He genuinely tried and Mary and him finally got to a good place. They were finally acting like a team. And though she might still have to "nag" him, he began taking on more of the mental load. And genuinely, if he'd been given more time, I think he'd be able to maintain them.
George and Mary's fights often came from a lack of communication. They both didn't appreciate how much the other did for them. And George often acted like he was forced into the marriage. But when Mary went to Germany, they finally had space. And they finally got the chance to actually miss each other.
And despite there still being conflicts when she came back, they both actively worked to work on them. He knew he loved her and would choose her of his own volition. Even their sex life drastically improved. And while he still had issues with his kids, they were teenagers and that was to be expected.
And it doesn't seem fair for him to be taken at this point. Sure, he'd had heart problems for years. And of course this is better than if he'd died without things being resolved. But it all felt so unfinished. It's like someone stopped in the middle of a chapter and opened up a new book. It felt heart breaking.
To be honest, the first time I watched the scene, I ended up having to rewind it. I was playing a mobile game and it went from George leaving for work and Mary telling him not to be late, to Mary receiving the news her husband died of a heart attack. It was jarring.
And his absence is felt so deeply it's painful. No matter the conflicts he'd had with people during life. No matter the conflicts he'd had with his family, he was finally on the right track. He should've been able to grow old alongside his wife and die from old age.
Final Thoughts
So I started watching "Georgy and Mandy's First Marriage". It doesn't feel the same without George. You can very clearly feel his absence. And knowing this was coming doesn't make it any less painful. But on the bright side, I think getting to watch the characters grow up made me more invested in their story.
Once I finish "Georgy and Mandy's First Marriage", I can see myself watching "The Big Bang Theory" from start to finish. Which is really saying something considering I'd never been interested before.
So yeah, I definitely recommend the series. You will cry by the end and curse yourself for going through with it but the journey makes it worthwhile.